Chronicles Of A Sex Doll Part 1

 

 

Have you ever tried to sell a sex doll?

Ya, dumb question, probably not.

Your probably wondering "Hey, why are you asking this question rather uncharacteristically on this blog of all places?"

Well let me tell you, selling a sex doll ain't all it's cracked up to be. 

Actually,

what?

This strange tale began quite randomly. The basic backstory to this was a close  friend of mine gave my roomate one that was given to her a few months ago by someone else. After New Years I agreed to take it off her hands, my roommate agreed to put the hard work into selling it and take the profits. We were guided to some sex doll forums and apparently they sell for a couple thousand dollars for the one we had of our quality. 

So, we agreed to keep it at our place for a few weeks until we can find some sort of buyer for it. Keep in mind, I live in what used to be a Convent for nuns before it was turned into an art collective co-living space, so of course hijinks ensued once the sex doll entered the living space.

Since it's a co-living space it's hard to really find a safe space to store a sex doll. My roomate and me at first stored it in the chapel (where we have events usually), and it wasn't long before people decided to move it somewhere else.  

Of course we anthropomorphized the hell out of that thing and even named it "Tampa". People in the house became convinced Tampa was possessed. Who knows, maybe they are right, I don't know. Several people in the house were very spooked by her, but then again the Convent is kind of a spooky place. I don't believe in ghosts, magic or any other sort of bullshit but if ghosts magic or any other paranormal bullshit exists the Convent is definitely full of all of it.

Including bullshit, it's a house of artists after all.

And probably nun ghosts.

Definitely nun ghosts.

Before long we would find Tampa in very strange poses throughout the house, sometimes exposed sometimes modest but always just...odd. I remember someone left her in a bathroom of all places (?) and someone opened the door after doing their business and literally jumped up startled as their reptile animal brain did a little glitchy loop de loop frantic little dance at thinking Tampa was an actual ass person just chilling in the bathroom. 

In a rocking chair

wearing sunglasses

at night

People were starting to get fed up with Tampa (not to mention properly made uncomfortable) and my roommate was pressured into getting rid of it postehaste. So we moved onto the next phase of selling a sex doll: Finding a buyer.

So my roommate began to dive into the shady online world of sex doll forums (they exist) to quickly find a buyer...

(To be continued)